Often, they do the fetishizing themselves.
I have never seen an intersectional feminist, even a black one, argue that black men are fetishized. When they do it's often from a black woman's standpoint. Intersectional feminism barely speaks on these issues.
You are not the only one sexualized and you are not the only victims. The main pox of the modern feminist movement is claims that women are the ultimate victims when they are just as likely to be perpetrators. I think many of our goals are aligned and I'm not convinced as to how modern feminism has any actual solutions for the problems that face men. I wish there were a bigger Egalitarian movement that fights both issues facing both sexes. It very much feels like a women's specific issue. But I'm not seeing any feminists fight for anything that makes things equal while claiming they are. I understand that many, many, many men still view women as objects. Women absolutely deserve empowerment, women deserve to be supported and not slut shamed when they are raped. I don't identify as an MRA, but I get it. Why don't you help form a campaign that champions the idea of therapy for men using that same platform? Even when under the guise of empathy men are still shamed and mocked. It's very common on social media for women to make posts like,"guys will do _ and _ rather than go to therapy". I understand that intersectional feminism is very much a thing that tries to tackle the web that affects gender, but in my experience, even with those acknowledgements they still lambast men. I saw this TED lecture of a woman's issue and I like this feminism, but it still blames an unseen force, the patriarchy, as the real reason for men's suffering. "Yes you were abuse and assaulted but really it was the patriarchy and therefore men who you should actually blame." Why would any man want to sign up for that? Please humor me. My friend stated that women uphold patriarchy just as much as men, but isn't that a little convenient? I feel like these big sweeping things like patriarchy are only held in place arguments to keep women from accepting responsibility for their actions. And yet it's men that are the most understanding of my concerns and issues and I'm seen as a bad person when I say I'm not a feminist. It was women that judge me because I'm less than 6 foot tall. It was women that said my worth was in my penis. She blames patriarchy but it's women that told me not to cry at my own fathers funeral and that I had to stay strong "for everyone else". She names the problem but gives zero solutions.
I expressed these feelings to a female feminist friend and she said it's just patriarchy and men being placed in boxes. I realize there are some feminists that argue this is a patriarchal issue and they seem to argue it in good faith that men are just as much victims of patriarchy as women are, but I'm not seeing it. Intersectional feminists regularly argue race issues from women's standpoint. While I acknowledge that there are some feminists tackling the topic of race, most notably intersectional feminists, is still feels like a massive blind spot. Would anything she's saying about men apply to black men or other non-white men? Imagine being an Asian boy and having a lifetime of dehumanization and emasculating behavior on the assumption - I'll reemphasize, assumption - that you have a small penis and therefore have little worth.īut according to feminism we have male privilege and are inherently oppressors. Imagine being a black boy and growing up in that environment and realizing at an early age that your worth is what is between your pants. People constantly sexualize black men and assume we are freaks in the sack as if that's our only worth.Īnd that's without the assumption that we are inherently criminals. You must be tall as a basketball player, have endless swag, and an 8 inch dick. To be a "real" black man, you must be alpha of the most alpha. Did I tell anyone? Fuck no.Īs a black man I am consistently fetishized, even by women of my own race. I wasn't even small either.įew years later? Had my cock grabbed by a girl to confirm to her girls my penis size. I was 14 years old and told out the gate that my worth was only through my penis size. As a black man, when I confessed I liked my first love and asked her out she told me she didn't like boys with "small dicks" and that she only liked guys with big dicks. Many issues feminists raise also pertain to men of color.
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